GUYS, THE HOLIDAYS ARE COMING

"Why don't y'all come on over for Thanksgiving?" The answer is probably no or we will see. Guys, brace yourselves, the holiday season is upon us again. I know, I know, you probably think it`s a little early to be talking about Thanksgiving. We haven't even gotten past Halloween yet, but this is the time I look forward to the most. I get to be around family, friends and most importantly, I get to eat! It`s the one day of the year when you don't have to feel bad for digging in. Yes, I know the history behind this day, but to me, it means spending time with loved ones and reflecting on all of the things I have to be thankful for. Besides, I`m not super creative when it comes to Halloween costumes. I`d probably just wear my panties and bra and call myself a Victoria Secret angel like I see the other girls do. Or maybe a sexy waitress, a sexy nurse, or a sexy infant. Y'all will make anything sexy huh? There wasn't anything sexy about me when I was an infant.

It`s very flattering and thoughtful when you get invited over to someone`s home for the holidays. It always feels good when people want you around for special times like that. But me? I`m a homebody. I've never left my family on a holiday to go to someone else`s house. Now, back in the day, I`d leave them around 10 pm to go to a college party, but never to eat somebody else`s mama food. Its different when you're not in the comfort of your own home. If you go get a third plate at your homie house, they looking at you like, "Dang, save some for other people" Now you got to flip over the dinner table and say "If I cant have none, cant NOBODY have none", just kidding, behave yourself, still get your plate though.

Then again, a part of me wants to go explore other homes and traditions. I really just want a reason to do my make-up and wear a "Thanksgiving dress". You know, after you wear that dress on Thanksgiving, its now the "Thanksgiving dress" and if you post it on Instagram, everyone else will see it that way too. So you better not wear it on Christmas. But I`m a rebel, I`ll wear it the week after and send a picture to your DM`s (direct messages).

Wherever you go this year, just make sure they know how to cook. Nothing ruins a day like nasty food. Some people don't know their way around the kitchen. Don't feel pressured to eat that nasty cornbread this year. How do you mess up some cornbread though? That's like, the easiest thing on the menu. Also, if they let the cats climb on the counter and the dogs sit at the table, they nasty. I`m pretty sure its some cat hair baked into that pie they keep trying to offer you. Gross.

Look, just learn how to cook this year, you still got a few weeks to get it together. I might even leave mama house to come see what you learned. Just have some margaritas as a back up though. At least if I drink enough of those, I`ll forget how nasty your macaroni was.

-BRIT

Previous
Previous

CRUSHES SUCK

Next
Next

I`M NOT DRIVING THIS TIME